Many people believe that the best way to achieve spiritual growth is through pain and suffering and I recently saw a discussion on social media on this topic, and as it is always good to review what your beliefs are, I decided to dig deeper into this subject.

First, what kind of pain are we talking about here?  There are many kinds of pain, physical, mental, emotional and spiritual, and every single one of them holds validity for the person experiencing that pain.

My first thought is that pain and suffering do indeed present opportunities for growth, but we are often so wrapped up in the pain that we miss the opportunities. Certainly that has been a major part of my story and if pain was a requisite to spiritual growth, I should have reached Enlightenment by now!!

I’d also say, from personal experience, that growth through pain runs the risk of not being true growth – pain can be a propulsion force, but it can also be a major inhibitor.

I only recently discovered this.  I hit a wall in my growth. An impasse.  I thought I was on a straight path, knowing exactly where I was heading but a barrier across that path slammed shut in my face and I had to turn aside.  In my words – I turned left at the gate.  That was super distressing and it was also the perfect opportunity to give up and walk away from everything.

That was two years ago, and it is only recently that I started to understand the reason for this ‘turning left at the gate.’  My perceived growth had mainly been through pain and in that respect it was not complete.  It was not balanced.  It was biased towards the belief produced through experience that humans must suffer in order to grow. Yes, it is the human condition to suffer, but it doesn’t have to be the only way for growth the occur.

Basically, I re-started my journey.  I had to withdraw and work out my new path and that involved a whole lot of digging into who I am.  I had to reassess every level of growth I had previously thought I had gained – because growth gained on the back of pain is not unlike accumulating wealth on the back of slavery.  You accumulate your treasure, but the cost is horrendous.

Pain taints everything.  In the physical world it is hard to be a complete and balanced person when you live with chronic pain.  It colours every thought, word and action.  Pain acts in exactly the same manner in the mental, emotional and the spiritual realms.  Yes, you can gain a form of growth through pain;  Ego can tell you that it is growth, and Ego isn’t necessarily lying to you, but, as am discovering on the journey that I have been sent upon since turning left at that gate, when you recognise pain, understand and accept the source of that pain and then work to resolve the issues raised with as little drama a possible, then you may discover the most potentially difficult, challenging, amazing and ultimately BALANCED growth opportunity.

And when you experience this difference, this growth through knowledge, experience, acceptance, and understanding, you begin the journey of balanced spiritual growth. It’s where you start to feel whole.